The Perfect Class
by Firebreathing Ghost
Summary: AU. Inuyasha, FMA, DGrayMan, Naruto with appearances by characters from other anime. What will happen when 27 characters get put into a gifted class? Can they save their school from the evil Board of Education? Let the fun begin!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I do not own anything from the universes Fullmetal Alchemist, Naruto, D. Gray-Man, Inuyasha, or any other anime else that shows up in the story.

**Note: **As the summery indicated, this story takes places in an alternate universe. In this universe, Ed and Al are 16 and 17, and Al has gotten his body back. However, Maes Hughes, King Bradley, etc are still alive. Naruto and crew are all 15 and older. Sasuke didn't run off with Orochimaru, and Sandaime is still alive. The exorcists are not having any akuma problems. Kagome and the others are not looking for the shards. Also, Inuyasha and Shippo are 17 and 8, instead of 67 and 50. And so on. Enough talk. Please enjoy!

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Twenty-seven students were gathered in a high school classroom. It was the first day of school, and the high school they were standing in was brand new. All of their previous schools had been shut down by the Board of Education, and this school was their city's last hope. These twenty-seven students had been called out of their homerooms. Apparently, there was something special prepared for them.

Twelve of those students were from Konoha Secondary School. Three were from Sunagakure S.S., which was located close to Konoha High, but slightly smaller. Three were from Central Secondary School, and four were from Feudal Tokyo Secondary School. Four students were still dressed in the uniforms of their old school, Dark Religious Catholic School.

There were a variety of characters in the room. Their ages ranged from eight to eighteen. Their hair colours ranged from black to silvery white; from bubble gum pink to golden blonde. There were also a variety of outfits, from an obnoxiously short skirt to a red kimono, and from black Catholic school uniforms to a bright orange jumpsuit. There were also a variety of races… well, okay, all of them were Japanese, with the exception of three Amestrian kids (Ed, Al and Winry), three Chinese kids (Lenalee, Tenten and Lee), an English boy (Allen) and a boy of mixed race (Lavi). They were gathered in various groups around the room, chatting and laughing.

"Good! You're all here!" a buxom blonde woman entered the room. A tall Chinese man with glasses carrying a mug of coffee accompanied her.

"Principal Tsunade?" a pink-haired girl named Sakura Haruno recognized her old principal from Konoha High.

"Yeah. They asked me to be the principal of this school," replied Principal Tsunade. "Good morning, everyone. All of you now know that I am your principal. This is your Vice Principal, Komui Li."

"Hi, brother!" Lenalee Li from Dark Religious Catholic School waved at him.

"You may be wondering why you're all here. The Board of Education has decided to create a 'gifted class' for this school. We chose the students with the most potential, and, here you are," continued Principal Tsunade. "Throughout this year, you will be taking all twenty courses our school has to offer, instead of four per semester like your peers."

"What?" gasped Ino Yamanaka, a girl who was Sakura's best friend and rival.

"No way!" cried a golden-haired, golden-eyed boy named Edward Elric.

"You're kidding!" groaned Miroku, the class pervert.

"But this is my last year!" a red-haired boy from Dark Religious named Lavi exclaimed. "I don't want it to be hell!" The rest of the class also displayed similar reactions.

"If you've got a problem, go complain to the Board. They came up with the idea," Tsunade shrugged. "If you have any questions, ask Mr. Li. He'll be keeping an eye on you this year. I've got lots to do, so I'll leave you now. Good luck!" With that, Tsunade left.

"I'll take your attendance!" announced Komui cheerfully. He read through all the names, from Gaara to Yamanaka, Ino.

"So where's our homeroom?" asked a silver-haired youkai named Inuyasha.

"You don't have one. You go to your first class of the day as soon as school starts. Here," Komui handed out slips of paper with their schedules. "It'll be hard at first, but you'll get sued to it. An as Ms. Tsunade said, I'll be hopping up every now and then to see how you're doing."

"But brother, you're the Vice Principal," said Lenalee. "Aren't you going to be really busy with paperwork and stuff?"

"Oh, no, don't worry," Komui waved it off. "The school secretary has it all under control. In fact, there he is right now! Everyone, say hi to Reever Wenham!"

A red-haired man stumbled by the classroom, struggling to see over the mountain of papers he carried. He gave an awkward grunt to acknowledge Komui, and walked on. A little bit down the hall, he attempted to turn the corner. He collided with the wall, and all the papers went flying. The class saw him struggle to gather up the work.

"He'll be fine," Komui assured the class, shutting the door. "Anyway, the class you're supposed to be having right now is drama. Your teacher called a few minutes ago to say she couldn't make it. It seems she's busy filming today, so I'll be keeping an eye on you!"

"That's great. But what are we going to do for the next seventy-five minutes?" asked a popular, good-looking boy named Sasuke Uchiha.

"Talk," shrugged Komui, taking a sip of coffee. And the class happily did just that until the bell rang. When it did, the class filed out of the room and exited the building. They were given five minutes to reach the greenhouses for their next class, botany.

"Hello. I am your botany teacher, Mr. Arystar Krory," a tall, pale man told the class once they were assembled at the back of the greenhouse. He had two-toned hair, and a very gentle, almost _depressed_ expression on his face. Two sharp fangs jutted out from under his upper lip, making him look like a real, live (or undead) vampire. "Today, we will be learning about man-eating Venus Flytraps. Please get into groups of three and sit around a plant."

All hell broke loose. Both Sakura and Ino wanted Sasuke to join their group, and expressed their desires loudly and high-pitched. However, he grouped up with the Sand Brothers Gaara and Kankurou. Tenten, a 16-year-old girl with her hair up in buns became the third member of Sakura and Ino's group. Lenalee teamed up with a white-eyed girl named Hinata Hyuga, and Hinata's crush, Naruto Uzumaki. Hinata's cousin Neji chose Kanda and Shino as his partners. And so on.

"Please draw a sketch of the plant, and label its parts," Mr. Krory drifted sorrowfully among the students and handed out pieces of blank paper. "Please treat these plants with love."

The students sat around huge, drooling plants. They opened their jaws once in a while to snap at the insects that flew by. All of the students were disgusted, but the four from Dark Religious, who'd had Krory before, were particularly alarmed. They occasionally twisted and moved, to hinder they students in their work. That particularly annoyed Edward Elric, who always had his plant move just when he was getting to the hardest parts.

"Stupid plant!" he cried in fury the sixth time that happened. "Stay still, dammit!"

"Ed! Don't call the plant names!" warned his partner, a white-haired boy named Allen Walker.

"Why not? It's not like it has feelings. Stupid, idiot, piece-of-a-crap plant!" Edward gave the table a little kick. The Venus Flytrap suddenly opened its leaves. It twisted over to Ed. And closed its jaws around his head.

"Brother!" Alphonse Elric cried, grabbing onto the stem of the plant. He unsuccessfully tried to tug it away from his brother. The man-eating Venus Flytrap didn't completely muffle Ed's swearing, as he tried to pry it off. The plant only clamped tighter in response to the names Ed called it. By now, the rest of the class had abandoned their own projects to come over and look.

"Nice plant! I love you!" Allen crooned lovingly, stroking the Venus Flytrap.

"Help me!" Edward pleaded. "It stinks in here!"

"You're such a beauty! I love you!" Alphonse joined Allen in complimenting the plant. Finally, after a good ten minutes, the plant finally loosened its jaws. Ed quickly pulled his head out, and put some distance between himself and the Man-eater. Everybody cheered.

"Back to your seats," Mr. Krory told everyone in his grieving voice. "And treat the plants with love." This time, everybody listened. Ed went to the bathroom to wipe the slime off his face. He didn't come back for the rest of the period, which passed by uneventfully. Finally, at 11:35, the bell rang for lunch. After dropping off their books, everyone headed towards the cafeteria.

"What would you like?" asked the chef, an effeminate Indian man with dreads named Jeryy.

Hinata Hyuga quickly ordered her lunch and paid Jeryy. Carefully balancing her tray, Hinata scanned the sea of people for a familiar face. She saw several, but wasn't sure she wanted to eat lunch with them. Finally, she spotted a group of girls from his class. Carefully holding her tray, she inched towards their table.

"Hi, Hinata," Lenalee smiled at her. They had been in the same group for Krory's project

"Can I sit here?" asked Hinata.

"Oh, sure!" Sango's cat Kirara jumped off the seat beside her, and Hinata sat down.

"Which school are you from, Hinata?" Kagome inquired.

"Konoha," replied Hinata.

"Wow! Over half of our class is from there! You must know a lot of people!" exclaimed Sango.

"Maybe you can introduce me? I barely know anyone," admitted Shippo.

"Sure. I think that between the five of us, we know everybody in our class," said Lenalee. "Where are you from, Shippo?"

"Well, I was supposed to go to Feudal this year, but it shut down," said Shippo. "I'm actually only 8. I skipped a few grades."

"Really?" gasped Hinata. "You're a genius!"

"Well, it's really not that impressive," Shippo grinned sheepishly. "I'm probably the youngest in the school, though. I'm glad I ended up in the same class as Kagome."

"Shippo's parents died when he was little," explained Kagome. "He lives with my family."

"Oh. I'm sorry," there was uncomfortable silence. "I don't really know anyone except for the ones that went to Konoha," revealed Hinata.

"Okay, the silver-haired guy over there is Inuyasha. He can be a jerk sometimes, but he sticks up for people if the get bullied," Kagome pointed to Inuyasha.

"The guy in the purple robes is Miroku," Sango pointed to the dark-haired boy sitting beside him. "We went to school with Inu and Miroku. Miroku's kind of a pervert."

"The boy with the short white hair and rune over his eye is Allen Walker," said Lenalee, pointing to the same table. "The guy with the red hair is Lavi. The other two at their table are Ed and Al, the Elric brothers."

"That blonde girl with the black tube top is Winry Rockbell," Sango pointed at a tableful of giggling girls. "I don't really know anyone else from that table."

"The girl with the pink hair is Sakura Haruno and the one with the blonde pony-tail is Ino Yamanaka. They're best friends, but they fight a lot," introduced Hinata. "And the girl with the brown hair is Tenten. The one with four blond pigtails is Temari. She went to Suna, which isn't all that far away from Konoha. Her brothers, Gaara and Kankurou are sitting over there. Gaara's got red hair and Kankurou's the one with the face paint." Hinata moved onto a table where a group of sullen boys sat silently. "The good-looking boy is Sasuke Uchiha. He's really popular. The one with sunglasses is Shino Aburame. And the one with white eyes is Neji Hyuga. I'm not sure who the boy with the bangs is."

"That's Yu Kanda, but we call him Kanda," Lenalee pointed at the kid in question. "He gets mad if people call him by his first name. He went to my old school."

"Hey, come to think of it, Neji kind of looks like you," Kagome observed. "Are you guys related in any way.

"Yeah. We're cousins," Hinata didn't sound too happy about the fact, so everyone decided to drop it.

"I think the ones from that table are in our class, too," Shippo pointed to a group of boys who were stuffing food down their throats, and complaining.

"There's Kiba Inuzuka and his dog Akamaru," Hinata started naming them. "Kiba and Shino have both been in all of my classes every year since kindergarten. And there's Shikamaru Nara, Chouji Akimichi, Rock Lee and, um… Naruto Uzumaki." Hinata's face reddened immensely when she said the last name.

"Hey, Naruto worked with us in botany, right?" Lenalee remembered.

"Really? What was he like?" inquired Kagome.

"Well, I get the impression that he's not the _best_ student, at least not in botany." replied Lenalee.

"Naruto always works hard and tries his best," Hinata stuck up for him.

"He _did_ try pretty hard to get the Man-eater right," agreed Lenalee.

"Does Mr. Krory always make you study such _interesting_ plants?" asked Kagome.

"Ugh. Yeah." Lenalee frowned. "Last year, he brought in a species of carnivorous roses that bit a student's finger off. He got it sewed back on, but his teammates had quite a time trying to get it back!"

"Twenty different classes per week," Sango studied her schedule. "What do you think the other teachers will be like?"

"I hope they're nice," said Shippo. "What class do we have next, anyway?"

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"Math. We've got math in room B109," Allen Walker consulted his schedule. He, Alphonse and Edward were racing through the halls looking for the classroom that hosted their next class. Allen and Edward had both ordered a lot of food for lunch, and Alphonse had waited patiently for them. As a result, all three of them were now running late.

"B102, B104, B106," Ed read off the class numbers as they ran by. "We should be close!"

"Here!" Allen spotted Lavi sitting in the front row through the open doorway of B109. The three of them braked in front of the door. The lesson had already begun, and they could hear their teacher's voice drifting out.

"If I owed Sakura $25, Ino $15 and Tenten $20, how much would I owe all together?" the teacher was a man with a mane of red hair dressed in long, black robes and a black hat that threw the upper face of his face in shadow.

"No way!" gasped Allen. Just then, the teacher spotted the three standing at the doorway.

"You're late. Please take your seats," he instructed them. Three seats in the back were empty, and the three of them sat down. Allen read the name the man put up on the blackboard, and the teacher's identity was confirmed.

"Do you know him?" hissed Edward.

"Yeah. That's Mr. Cross Marian. He used to teach at my old school. When my foster father died, he took me in with him. Then, last year, he left, saying he wanted to see the world. Cross is really good at borrowing money, but not so good at returning it," Allen hissed back.

"If he left last year, who do you live with now?" whispered Ed.

"Kanda, Lavi and I each pay one-third of the rent for our apartment," replied Allen.

"Allen Walker and… Edward Elric, is it?" Cross Marian looked in their direction.

"Yes, sir!" they answered.

"If I borrowed $100 from Chouji, and there was a 10 interest per year, how much would I owe him by the end of three years?" Mr. Marian asked them.

"$131.10?" Ed offered after doing some calculations.

"He wouldn't owe him anything," Allen muttered semi-fondly. "I'd be working it off for him."

"Correct. By the way, you wouldn't happen to have a hundred on you, would you?" Mr. Marian asked Chouji. Chouji began to search through his pockets. Allen sighed, deciding he might as well pay back Chouji as soon as possible. Nope, his teacher hadn't changed at all.

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Their last class was chemistry with Roy Mustang. Mr. Mustang was a good-looking dark-haired man the same age as Komui. Sakura and Ino took quite a fancy to him, but their hopes were shattered when Winry informed them of the rumor that he had a thing for one of the life skills teachers, Riza Hawkeye. Mr. Mustang taught them a few things about the element table, and assigned them a few things from the textbook for homework. At the end of the period, he put on his special 'ignition cloth gloves' and set the science skeleton on fire, much to the delight of most of the class. Then, the final bell rang at 3:15, signaling the end of the class. Everyone rushed to their lockers.

"Hey, Temari, want to come do homework at my house? You can stay for dinner," Winry invited her new friend. In addition to Mustang's textbook work, Marian had assigned them five sheets of math homework, and Krory had given them a sheet of questions about the man-eating Venus Flytrap.

"Okay. I won't be home for dinner tonight," Temari told her brothers as she passed by them. "We're orphans, and we live by ourselves. I cook all of our meals and do the chores."

"They can come too," offered Winry.

"Nah. Let them fend for themselves. You know what? Let's make it a sleepover! That'll teach them to appreciate their big sister," Winry and Temari giggled.

"I'm home!" Winry announced when they entered her house on Resembool Drive. She was a little later than usual, because they had gone to Temari's house to pick up some stuff. They entered the kitchen. "I brought a friend home for dinner! Is it okay if she sleeps over?"

"Sure," a short, old, bespectacled woman with grey hair was chopping vegetables for dinner.

"That's my grandma, Pinako Rockbell. Grandma, this is Temari." Winry introduced.

"Are you in the same class? The boys told me all three of you ended up in the 'gifted class'" said Pinako.

"Grandma Pinako teaches technology at our school," Winry told Temari proudly.

"I'm getting too old for teaching," added Pinako. "I'm going to retire soon, and lead a nice, quiet life right here in this house."

Just then, Edward and Alphonse walked into the kitchen. Ed was wearing a T-shirt and shorts that clearly showed his auto-mail limbs. He nodded at Temari in acknowledgement, and Al said hello. Ed went into the cupboard, and pulled out a bag of chips.

"We're going to train," Ed told Pinako, and the brothers headed outside.

"I didn't realize Ed and Al lived with you," said Temari. "Are you cousins or something?"

"They've lived with us for a pretty long time, ever since their mother died. Their father walked out on them when they were young," explained Winry. "Well, they haven't lived with us _all_ that time. They went to live and train with their teacher a while back. We're not related, but I feel like they're my brothers."

"What's wrong with Ed's arm and leg?" asked Temari.

"After they finished their training, Ed got into an accident," said Pinako. "He and Alphonse came back to live with us after that."

"Anyway, what do you think of the school?" Winry quickly changed the subject. "It sucks how we have to learn more than anybody else, huh? What do you think the other teachers will be like?"

"No one too weird, I hope," replied Temari. "Actually, I thought all of our teachers today were okay. Krory seemed kind of out of it, and Marian didn't talk about anything besides money, but I can live with them."

"I think the school's pretty good. Everything's new, and actually clean," said Winry. "I like it so far. Even though we have to take twice the number of classes everyone else takes."

"I like it too," agreed Temari. "I hope the Board of Education doesn't shut it down, like they did with all the other high schools in this city."


	2. Chapter 2: Day 2 with Hawkeye

"Good morning!" Ino called to Sakura cheerily as she joined her in the schoolyard.

"What's so good about it?" grumbled Sakura.

"Bright skies. Warm weather. Class outside. Sasuke and Kanda," Ino listed her favourite things. "What's _not_ good about it?"

"Our first class! Idiot pig, did you even look at your schedule?" growled Sakura.

"Don't call me that, Forehead-san!" Ino growled back.

"Ugly pig!"

"Big forehead!"

"Ugly!"

"Forehead!" And so, Ino and Sakura began to wrestle.

"Hey! Calm down!" Lenalee, Kagome and Sango quickly crossed the yard to stop the fight.

"For your information, I did so read the schedule!" Ino pulled a folded piece of paper from her shuriken holder. She pointed at the slot for Period 1 of Day 2. "See? Life skills, meet in schoolyard."

"Look at the name of the teacher!" snapped Sakura.

Ino did. "Riza Hawkeye? Who's that?"

"She's the evil woman who's dating Roy-kun!" screeched Sakura.

"I'm Riza Hawkeye," a blonde woman with a very cool demeanor walked out of the school building.

Riza Hawkeye was dressed in a crisp, blue army uniform. She held a clipboard in her hand. There were guns strapped to her hips. She walked to the middle of the schoolyard, and surveyed the scene. Kanda, Sasuke and Neji were gathered in one corner of the schoolyard, brooding. Ino, Sakura, Lenalee, Sango and Kagome were standing together. Naruto was napping under a large tree while Lee did pushups. Inuyasha was napping under the shade of a different tree while Lavi and Miroku happily read one of Miroku's 'special' magazines. Riza crossed her arms and waited. Within ten minutes, the rest of the class had shown up. Riza waited for them to gather around her before she took attendance. Finally, she gave them her start-of-class speech.

"All of you are from different schools. Those schools have been shut down by the Board of Education. This high school is the city's last attempt at a public high school," said Riza. "For the last five years, the Board of Education has been shutting down high schools like crazy. The Board of Education granted us this final chance, but on one condition. We had to create one class, and have the class take every subject the school offers, to prove that students with public school education aren't total idiots. If all of you maintain at least a 75 average, you will pass."

"75!" cried Naruto. "That's crazy! Tsunade never told us that!"

"I know. She told me to go over it with you in more detail," said Riza.

"All of us? 75! That's impossible!" declared Lavi. "What if we fail?"

"Then, the school will be closed down. And you will all be transferred to the only school that has escaped the wrath of the Board of Education." Riza smiled grimly. "Orochimaru's Private Institute."

"Orochi-?" The name was familiar, but no one remembered where they'd heard it.

"Now, onto Life Skills," Riza flipped to the next class on her clipboard. "In this class, I will not only teach you to survive in the great outdoors. You will learn to hunt for food, find directions, shoot a gun, and other such things. In this unit, there will be mandatory camping trips every Friday night. Please have your parent or legal guardian sign these forms. Hand it to me by Thursday." Riza unclipped some forms from the clipboard and passed it to the students. "If you are eighteen or live by yourself, you can just sign it and give it to me right now."

Over half of the class signed their forms and handed them to her.

"The first thing we'll be learning about is edible foods in the forest," said Riza. She unclipped some more papers and handed them out. "If you're ever stranded in the middle of a forest, you need to eat. More importantly, you need to know what you can and can't eat. Does anyone here want to die by eating a poisonous mushroom?" Everyone shook their heads. "I didn't think so. The handout I gave you lists edible plants most commonly found in a forest. Review it carefully. There will be a quiz on it in twenty minutes."

She was met with cries of protest.

"You only get this class once a week. I have to make the best of the time I spend with this class," Riza informed them. "Now study!"

As promised, Riza gave them their quizzes. She marked them on the spot, while making them read information about mushrooms. Finally, she informed them with displeasure that less than half had passed.

"If you don't want to go to Orochimaru's school, I suggest you pull those grades up," Riza told them sternly. "I know that I definitely don't want to go work for him." Then, they spent the rest of the class reading about edible forest animals, and the bell rang. Everyone went to their next class, 20th century world history.

A tiny old man with black circles around his eyes taught history. He did not give them his name, telling them to call him Bookman. Lavi seemed to know him, and affectionately addressed him as "Panda". History was not too interesting (as history tends to be). Until halfway through the period, when a frightening-looking man with scars running down his face showed up at the classroom.

"Yes?" Bookman stopped writing on the blackboard and faced the man.

"I'm Ibiki Morino, the guidance councilor," the man introduced himself. "I need to borrow Gaara for a few minutes."

"Fine," agreed Bookman. Gaara got out of his seat and followed Ibiki. Ten minutes later, Gaara and Ibiki returned. Gaara had the same expression he always wore.

"Next, I need… Inuyasha," Ibiki called the next name on his list. Inuyasha got up and followed. Another ten minutes passed (and most of the class was watching the class. History really was so very… uninteresting). Inuyasha and Ibiki returned. Inuyasha had a very distinct twitch in his eye. Next, it was Kankurou's turn. Kankurou returned, as inscrutable as his brother. Then, Lavi went. When he came back, his face looked rather freaked out.

"Miroku," Ibiki read the next name on his list. Miroku left the classroom.

"What's wrong?" asked Allen, who was sitting beside him.

"You wait your turn," Lavi told him. "You'll see."

Ibiki got to Elric, Alphonse before the bell rang. The students trudged out of history, and went to their lockers. Each left with one very distinct conclusion: "Even the bloodiest battles and the most depressing times could be made to sound like listening to someone read the phone book when history is taught by Bookman." The ones who went to counseling had one other thought: "Ibiki Morino is creepy." Although some, like Temari and Shino, returned from the counseling session as indifferent as ever, others definitely showed their dislike of Ibiki. Shippo came back _crying._

After lunch, the class had world geography with a very young teacher by the name of Nami. She was so smart that she skipped several grades. She was straight out of teacher's college, and younger than some people in the class were.

"First, we're going to label a map of Asia!" Nami told her class brightly. She gave them a handout with a blank map of Asia, and another handout with a list of the places they needed to label and colour. "Read over the list. Textbooks are at the fr-"

"Hey, Nami! I forgot my binder!" a skinny boy with black hair and a straw hat dashed into the room.

The boy stood at the front and surveyed the classroom. He finally spotted his binder, which was in Hinata's desk. The boy's arms stretched like rubber. They reached into Hinata's desk, retrieved the binder, and shrunk back to normal size. Hinata had a horrified expression on her face.

"Good-bye, Luffy," Nami told him through gritted teeth.

"Bye, everyone! Thanks!" Luffy waved at the class, and disappeared.

Nothing of too much interest took place the rest of geography. The rest of the class met with Ibiki Morino for their guidance appointments, and all of them left with the distinct impression that they never wanted to see him again. The last class of the day was careers. A slack-jawed teacher with back hair and glasses taught it. He had a very vacant expression on his face. He introduced himself as Kimura-sensei. When the class entered his classroom, he made everyone line up at the front of the room, and surveyed them intently.

"You three sit in the seats closest to my desk!" Kimura told Kagome, Lenalee and Winry. They obeyed, giving him strange looks. Kimura put the rest of the girls in the desks that were next closest, and waved the boys off with disinterest. He regarded his students with disappointment after they sat down. "Only 9 girls! Oh so disappointing!"

"So, what do we do in this class?" asked Edward.

"Ah, yes. Careers. In this class, you will plan your future, and the path you wish to take. You will learn how to write a resume, and the requirements your dream jobs have," Kimura told them in a monotone.

"So, Kimura-sensei, why did you become a teacher?" Shippo questioned innocently.

"Why…? Why did I become a teacher?" Kimura glanced at Lenalee, Winry and Kagome, who were arranged around his desk. He started to drool. "Well, the truth is… I became a high school teacher because… because…" he added such an air of suspense that the students began to gain interest. Everyone leaned forward, or at least started to pay attention. "You see, I became a high school teacher because… _I LIKE HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS!"_

Enter silence. "What?" Allen finally asked as if he hadn't heard right.

"Yes! I like high school girls!" Kimura declared as he ran up and down the aisles in ecstasy. "I love them! Everything about them! I love their lack of wrinkles and grey hair!" Kimura proclaimed as he ran past Kagome. "I love their innocence!" he announced as he ran past Hinata. "I love their energy!" he cheered as he ran past Winry. Finally, he came to a stop beside Lenalee. He reached out a shaking hand. "But… what I love… what I love the most about them… about high school girls… is… I love… _their uniforms!!!_" Kimura rested his hand on Lenalee's shoulder. Big mistake.

Komui leapt out of nowhere with a banshee cry. He landed in front of Kimura, and broke the perverted teacher's contact with his younger sister with a quick karate chop. The whole class could clearly see an electronic gadget cradled in his arm. It was rather frightening-looking, with drills and saws sticking out of it. Komui proceeded to mutilate Kimura with the gadget. The whole class stared at their VP in astonishment. Komui looked like a man possessed. When he finally calmed down, Kimura was a mess of blood and gore. Komui turned to the class with a smile on his face.

"Inuyasha and Kiba, could you go and fetch Nurse Kaede?" Komui's voice was pleasant enough, but his temper was still fresh on everyone's minds. Inuyasha and Kiba scooted out of the classroom without a word. "Winry and Allen, please go find Kouga, the custodian." Winry and Allen left in the same fashion as Inuyasha and Kiba. Komui turned to the rest of class. "So, what was Kimura-sensei discussing with you?"

"Um… high school girls…" Lavi sweatdropped.

"Was he now?" Komui gave Kimura a painful kick.

"Good afternoon, class!" Tsunade called to them. She entered the classroom with Reever (and a large stack of paperwork) in tow. Two other people followed; a handsome, dark-haired man who wore very thick glasses, and a young girl with spiky hair who was eating a sucker.

"Oh, good afternoon Principal Tsunade," Komui greeted them cheerfully. "Hello, Reever. Who might these lovely people be?"

"This is Tyki Mikk and his assistant, Road Kamelot. They're from the Board of Education," Tsunade introduced them with an expression that clearly told of her hate. "I'm just giving them a tour of the school. Right now, they're doing assessing the classrooms."

"What happened?" Road poked Kimura with her foot.

"Oh. I'm afraid a terrible accident has taken place," Komui tried to hide his drills-and-saws gadget behind his back.

"Really," Tyki scribbled down some things in the clipboard he was carrying. Tsunade glared at Komui threateningly.

"The nurse is coming. And the janitor, too. So don't worry," Komui assured them.

"And what subject is this? Science?" Tyki looked up and adjusted his thick glasses.

"Careers."

Tyki wrote some more. "That will be all. You will hear from us tomorrow," he told Tsunade. "Come on, Road."

"See you soon!" Road winked at the class. Tsunade and Reever left with them to see them off.

For the rest of the period, the class completed their homework/ goofed around/ brooded/ napped under the watchful eye of Komui. During the period, Nurse Kaede, an old woman with an eyepatch came to take care of Kimura (she ended up having Inuyasha and Kiba take him to the Nurse's office). Kouga, a young man with long black hair who worked as the janitor came to clean up the blood and body fluids. When the bell rang, everyone filed out of the classroom.

"So they were from the Board of Education," Lavi said to Allen as they left.

"Why do I have a bad feeling about this?" frowned Allen.


End file.
